You Said You'd Never Leave Me
by InuFan-Kenhandora
Summary: Kagome makes the greatest sacrifice to save InuYasha's life. And as horrible as it seems at first, her sacrifice turns into a blessing in disguise.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

"There has to be **something** you can do!" Kagome gripped Kaede-baba's arm fiercely, her tears streaming down her cheeks and pitter-pattering against the floor of the old woman's small home as she leaned over a human InuYasha, who cried out unconsciously as the woman put bandages over his grave wounds.

"Child, there is nothing that I can do for him now. All I can do is make him comfortable." The old woman placed a gentle hand on the girls, which brought her back to her senses enough to shirk away from the both of them. She took a moment to give InuYasha a drink of some kind that made him relax and fall into a deep sleep before she looked back to Kagome. "How did this happen in the first place?"

Kagome stifled a sob and wiped her cheeks, which did little to stop her from crying. She sniffled, and then spoke quietly. "It's my fault. Miroku, Sango, and I went after a jewel shard I had sensed, but it led us into one of Naraku's traps. InuYasha, as always, refused to be left behind and came after us. I messed up, I let myself get caught. He just wanted to protect me. And in the end, Naraku ran him through with his own sword. I was stupid, I was so **damn** stupid!"

She broke down once again and had to excuse herself from the company of her friends. InuYasha groaned in pain, and Kaede gave him a bit more of the drink, which settled him yet again. No one spoke, but that was because they all knew there was nothing to say. InuYasha would not be alive when the sun came up. He would die and there wasn't a single thing anyone could do. And as horrible as such a thing was, it hurt Kagome the most. She saw something in InuYasha that none of them could, she understood him on a much greater level than anyone else. Now she would carry the terrible burden of believing that it was her own foolishness that had caused him to get hurt, that she was personally responsible for his death. His blood, literally and figuratively, was on her hands.

"I'll go see how Kagome is doing." Sango spoke softly, rising from her spot near the fire and leaving for a few moments before swiftly returning. "She's gone. I looked around, but she's nowhere to be found."

"Perhaps she just needs to be alone. She'll come back soon. She won't leave him for that long." Miroku gently took Sango's hand and just held it quietly for a while. The night drew on as they all sat vigil at InuYasha side. He didn't make pained noises anymore, and his breathing had begun to grow slow and weak. It wouldn't be much longer now, and come the next day, they would have his funeral and lay him to rest on the grounds of the shrine. Kagome didn't return when he finally left the world. Kaede confirmed it, and they covered his face with a blanket out of respect.

They were all half-asleep, when Kagome did return from wherever she had gone. Miroku went to say something, but silenced himself when he saw the serious look on her face. Her cheeks were tear-stained, but she wasn't crying anymore and there was something hidden in her eyes that he couldn't place. She walked over to InuYasha and sat down beside him, pulling back the blanket and leaning over to kiss him on his forehead, and then briefly on his cold and paling lips. She smiled half-heartedly and ran her hands through his hair before she finally acknowledged them. "Leave."

"But Kagome-chan," Shippo looked at her confused, and asked what they all were thinking. "Why?"

"Please." she said, her eyes pleading. "I just want a few minutes alone with him, to say goodbye."

"Certainly, Kagome." Kaede said, picking up a sleepy Shippo, and nodding towards the door. "We will go for a walk and clear our heads. Take your time."

The sun had just begun to crest over the horizon, a few rare beams breaking through the forest trees, when they returned back to the hut to find it completely empty, save for InuYasha's body. And when he groaned, they all jumped back with fright, and waited a moment to see if it was him, or just his vengeful spirit that had made the noise. And Sango cried out when the first light of day came through the hut and cast it's glow upon him, changing him back into his hanyou form. And then he sat up, confused at why his friends were looking at him as though a ghost had just said hello to them.

"What's going on? Where's Kagome? And why do I feel like I died and came back again?" He squinted in the sunlight as he held his ribs and grunted his questions to them.

"Because you did." Shippo remarked, and all InuYasha could do was stare.

* * *

**AUTHORS NOTE:**I realize that this is a very short beginning. But it's only a prologue, and not a real chapter. It's setting the ground for the rest of the story to play off of and I assure you, the rest of the chapters will be much longer than this. I felt it necessary to put the prologue by itself just to see how people respond to this story first.I'm writing it for a challenge on another site called Anime Spiral. Also, the title of this story is taken from the title of the challenge. Thank you for your patronage! 


	2. The Miko: Kigasan

**Chapter One-The Miko: Kiga-san**

InuYasha stood on the high branch of a tree and stared into the distance. The sun had half fallen over the horizon and its reflection shimmered of the water that he could just barely begin to see. He sighed and closed his eyes a moment as the last warm light shone across his face and body, coloring him in its golden orange brilliance._ Almost a year, a year since she…_ His thoughts had drifted and he sniffed the air a moment when he remembered what it was that he was supposed to be doing. _Nothing._

"InuYasha?" A young voice called up to him and he glanced down to see Shippo and Kirara staring up at him through the branches and leaves.

"As always, nothing." His words held a twinge of sadness as he carefully swung down the branches to the forest floor where the two waited. Kirara twitched her tail and mewed, hopping up on his shoulder and nuzzling him. "I know. I miss her too. C'mon, we got to get back before Sango and the monk start worrying."

The walk back to camp was quiet, as it always was, and InuYasha's thoughts began to drift once again. _Where could she have gone?_ He remembered quite clearly waking up in the early morning after that battle with Naraku and finding out that he had died in the night and then mysteriously came back to life. It was mysterious, because none of them had actually seen him come back, and the one person who might have known had disappeared that night and never returned. _Kagome, for what reason did you go?_ He remembered his frantic search, and even how he'd gone to her time to find that Kagome hadn't returned there either. And all of his searches for her had led nowhere. He'd caught her trail leaving the village, but then it was as if she had suddenly ceased to be. There wasn't even so much as a cold trail to follow anymore. _Almost as if some ethereal thing flew down and took her away._ Now every night he'd climb as high as he could go and smell the wind in the meager hopes of even catching her scent in passing.

"Are you hungry InuYasha?" Sango asked him, holding out a bowl of soup with rice and a skewered fish that was still steaming from being cooked. He shook his head to decline and sat down by the fire. He hadn't had much of an appetite for a long while. He had also become much more reserved. Of course, realizing that one had died was definitely a sobering experience. He listened as the others held quiet conversations amongst themselves, having learned very quickly that without Kagome around, he didn't have much to say. He watched as Shippo and Kirara ran around before finding some quiet corner to go to sleep in, and watched as both Miroku and Sango settled in. He watched as the embers of the fire slowly withered and began to turn black, like his hopes of ever seeing her face again. And before too long the fire had gone out completely and he laid back to stare up at the stars twinkling in the twilight._ Kagome. Come back, please. Can't you see that we need you? Can't you see that I need you?_ And eventually, he too fell asleep, feeling that deep-seeded loneliness and feeling that somehow he'd been responsible for her leaving.

------------------------------_Early the Next Morning_------------------------------

"Kiga-san! Kiga-san, I've lost my way! Please come find me!" A small voice cried out from the forest, and had startled the group who'd just finished a quick breakfast and were about to set out on their way again.

"We should go help." Miroku had already kneeled down and picked up his staff from the ground. Sango gave a firm nod when he glanced her way and then looked at InuYasha for approval.

"Let's go. It sounds like it's just a poor lost kid." InuYasha told her. They spread out, listening for the child's cries again. It didn't take them long to find the little girl sitting on a barely used deer trail, clutching a basket of flowers and weeping terribly. She jumped with fright when she heard them coming and shirked away from the group.

"Shh. It's okay. We're here to help you." Sango crouched down a short length away and held her hand out to the child, smiling softly in assurance that they wouldn't harm her. "Please, take my hand."

The little girl shuddered and cautiously reached out and took a hold of Sango's hand, wiping away her tears with the other. "Can you take me to my Kiga-san?"

"Of course." Sango replied as they began to walk out of the woods. InuYasha studied the little girl a moment. There was something familiar about the child, but he couldn't place from where. She glanced back at him and scowled before sticking out her tongue at him when she noticed him staring at her. _What the…? That little brat!_ InuYasha growled and looked away when he sensed something coming at them fast. He stopped in his tracks and got into a fighting stance, a hand gripping the hilt of the Tetsusaiga.

"What is it InuYasha?" Shippo cowered slightly and moved behind Miroku, gripping the bottom of his robe. The others turned to see their friend glaring ahead of them as something rode up the trail, kicking up dirt along the way and if they hadn't have known better, they'd have thought it was a stampede coming their way. Finally in view, they could see a young woman dressed as a miko riding fast towards them on a two-headed dragon youkai. She had dark hair tied back into a braid that had a red ribbon running through it and had an arrow knocked and bow drawn, aiming straight at him. He caught the menacing glare on her face and stepped back a bit, ready to draw his sword and slay the woman if she tried anything.

"Unhand the child or I'll be forced to slay you." the woman's words were serious and cold, and somehow, the woman seemed familiar. InuYasha sniffed the air, but he couldn't recognize her. While he was sure there were plenty of miko's in the world, they hardly saw much of them since their business didn't require them to visit very many Shinto shrines.

"Kiga-san!" The child burst from Sango's grasp and ran towards the woman. The woman withdrew her bow and put the arrow back into the quiver on her back before leaping down to embrace the child. She looked at the group and her jaw dropped slightly as if in surprise. InuYasha was positive that they knew each other. However, the woman hid it well and turned her attention back to the child.

"Ri…Rii-chan, you know better than to go off into these woods without me or one of the other vassals. Our Lord would be very upset with you right now. What were you thinking?" Kiga-san asked, picking up Rii-chan and placing her on the beast she'd ridden up on.

"Ah-Un! Silly boys." Rii-chan said, hugging each head. Kiga-san cleared her throat and looked very sternly at the girl, waiting for her answer. Rii-chan frowned and blushed from embarrassment. InuYasha watched the little girl and the animal she was talking to. _That name of that animal sounds familiar. _Slowly everything started to fall into place.

"I just wanted to pick some flowers for our Lord before he returned!" She patted the creature's heads as she spoke. "I took Ah-Un with me, but they wandered off after some sweet grasses and I got lost."

"I knew I recognized that name." InuYasha blurted out, pointing at the beast. "That's Sesshoumaru's pack animal, and that must be the little human Rin that he's been taking care of. So if these two are here, that means my brother and his toad are somewhere nearby. This only leaves one thing out of place, you, miko."

"What I'm doing with the child and the beast is none of your business, daemon." Kiga-san, reaching back and clutched an arrow, drawing it out and knocked it, but didn't draw the bow. InuYasha drew his sword and held it out in front of him.

"Yes, it is strange." Miroku stepped forward and put himself between the two before a fight could start. "We don't mean any harm, and we'd just like to know why a miko such as yourself would ally with a terrible daemon like Sesshoumaru."

Kiga-san glanced down a moment and then with a renewed resolve looked straight at Miroku "I owe him my life."

"Kiga-san takes care of me and helps my Lord Sesshoumaru collect…" before Rin could finish, the miko clasped her hand over her mouth to silence her.

"Rin!" Kiga-san shook a finger at the girl when she finally pulled her hand away. "We don't discuss our Lord's business with strangers.

"Gomen ne Kiga-san." Rin's voice was sad as she voiced her apology and she looked away from the woman.

"Come Rin, it's time to leave." The woman grabbed Ah-Un's reins and turned the animal around and began to walk away.

"Wait, please, Kiga-san." Miroku called. Sango shot him a disgusted look in expectance of what she thought he'd ask, but he shook his head to tell her that he wasn't making advances. InuYasha looked at him and saw by the way the monk watched the woman that he had the same suspicions as the hanyou did.

"Obviously 'Kiga-san' is a nickname, would you be kind enough to tell us your _real_ name?" The woman halted Ah-Un and turned her head back towards them.

"It is a nickname, one I only allow Rin to call me, just as I alone can call her Rii-chan. And I don't care to give my name to strangers, but if you must call me something, you may call me Lady Miko as my Lords vassals do." The miko replied and turned again, disappearing down the trail with Rin and Ah-Un.

"That was suspicious." Sango said as they made their way back to their camp to get their things.

"I agree. I felt that somehow we knew that miko, but I couldn't quite place from where. I think that we should stay here a while until we can figure out what's really going on." InuYasha scowled. He didn't like it when he didn't know every aspect of things. It left him unsure of what move to take next.

"I don't think we go to see her real face anyhow." Miroku commented.

"What do you mean? I don't think that she was a daemon, someone would have sensed it. Besides, why would she want to hide her face in the first place?" Sango didn't believe that a miko was capable of such things. She'd only heard of daemons who had the ability to deceive people in such a way.

"I've heard that some miko's can use daemonic energy in different ways. Some such ways are to mask their faces or change their scents. Many use it as a ploy against other daemons, but I feel her reason was much different." Miroku looked to his friends. "I side with InuYasha on this matter. Something is wrong here, and we should stay until we find what that is and then correct it if possible."

"Agreed." Sango said firmly as Shippo nodded and Kirara mewed her approval.

------------------------------_Elsewhere_------------------------------

"Greetings Lady Miko, Rin." an elderly daemon man working some wood greeted the two as they entered through the gates of a modest castle. The two smiled and bowed to the man. Lady Miko led Ah-Un into his stable and helped Rin down off of him. The little girl smiled and hugged the woman before running off to play.

"Don't leave the grounds this time Rii-chan!" Lady Miko called after her, and Rin turned to wave her agreement. _She can be such a handful sometimes, but I can't help but love her._ The woman smiled to herself as she watched Rin run around and then turned away to return to her work in the castle. Of course she was Rin's guardian when Lord Sesshoumaru wasn't around, but her duties also required making sure the castle ran as it should.

Normally, Lord Sesshoumaru would have rather wandered with her, Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Un without having an actual home. It wasn't the way of daemons like himself. However, it had become apparent, much to her own influence, that it would be better and safer for Rin if there was one place she knew to call home. Begrudgingly, her Lord had obliged and they had taken over this castle after a battle had claimed all the residents. The place was cleaned and they moved in, bringing in lesser daemons to serve them. Of course, this also meant the assurance that none of those lesser daemons would meet their fate at the claws of the Lord of the West, so they had quickly agreed. There had even been some humans who had agreed to do the job, and had been given jobs solely because she had willed it. The Lord wasn't home as much as he used to be. He had his land to guard, so she really had more control of the home than he did. _It's almost as if I'm the lady of the house, except that I'm not his wife, thank goodness._

She sighed and removed her sandals at the door and stepped into the castle, making her way quickly through the corridors that had once confused her when they had first arrived, but were now little more than a thought as she found her room and slipped inside. She walked over to a low table cluttered with papers and bottles of ink. _There is still so much to do. We have to send a hunt out for fresh meat for the human residents, and have the daemon scavengers out to fresh battlefields for food for the other daemons. And our crop isn't doing as good as it should. But we have plenty of fresh water for cooking and drinking. We need to have someone sent out to get more cloth for clothes for Rin and the others and I need more herbs for my medicines and daemon wards._

It took her some time to get everything in order, and it was dark by the time she was done. She stood, and went back towards the door to see what the others were doing. Many of the workers were still busy and Rin was running around chasing fireflies and trying to catch them in her hands. "Everyone, you can retire for the night. Rii-chan it's time for you to go to bed."

"Awe, Kiga-san! Do I have to?" The little girl paused and made a sad face.

"Yes, come on now, I'll even tuck you in." The miko motioned for her to come and Rin giggled and ran over to her. A little while later, Rin had been washed up and dressed in her night kimono and laid down to sleep. The miko covered her up and kissed her forehead. The girl had burned a lot of energy today and was fast asleep in moments.

"Goodnight Rii-chan." whispered the woman as she disappeared from the room. She walked towards the servant's quarters and peeked her head into the main room there. A lone daemon woman named Shika sat eating her dinner and stood to bow when she saw the woman standing there. Shika looked no older that the miko, though she was sure that the woman must have been more than twice her age. She was the miko's personal assistant.

"Lady Miko, how may I help you?" Shika bowed deeply to her, looking over her long deer-like nose with her brown-gold eyes. You could see clearly that she was once a woods daemon, and her other form was probably a doe.

"I was hoping that when you were done eating you could have someone draw my bath for tonight." Lady Miko asked as she bowed back to the woman, smiling gently when she rose.

"Of course, Lady Miko." Shika bowed again and ran off, not finishing her supper, even though the miko had told her she could. Many of the servants were wary like that, mostly because of Lord Sesshoumaru's impatience. No amount of her kindness could change their fear of what would happen if they didn't act quickly enough.

Lady Miko lazily made her way to the bathhouse, glad that the day was at an end. She'd had to much stress as it was. _First Rin disappears, and then **they** showed up. And I was up to my neck in paper work. If **that**__doesn't remind me of my younger years, I don't know what would._ By the time she made it to the bath house, the large tub had already been filled and was steaming with hot, scented water. Some towels had been laid out and a clean kimono, red in color with swans and purple flowers, sat resting near the towels for when she was done bathing. Along the edge of the tub were brightly colored bottles and jars filled with various pleasant scented items for her to use.

She undressed and undid her hair, letting out a long sigh as she slipped into the water. She sunk under for a minute and came back up, staring at her reflection in the water. It looked odd and then she remembered why. Letting out a small release of her powers, she felt her mask drop away and she felt refreshed, but naked in a way. She looked down again at the reflection and smiled. "It's good to be Kagome again."


	3. The Truth of Her Disappearance

**Chapter Two - The Truth of Her Disappearance**

Kagome lounged in the bathhouse for a good long time, washing herself with some bath oil that smelled of jasmine and a mix of fragrant spices that were just a bit musky. She stared at the ceiling and closed her eyes for a bit. It was rare when she took time like this to relax. _Sometimes I feel like more of an adult than I really am. Really, I'm barely eighteen, but sometimes I swear it's more like I'm thirty. I suppose that's how it is in this era. Everyone just grows up to fast._ She sighed and opened her eyes again, lifting a hand out of the water and saw that it was beginning to prune. She stood, the steam rising off of her as the chilly night air blew in from a high window that vented the heat. Instinctively she shuddered and wrapped a towel around herself as she climbed from the oversized tub.

She wrapped her hair up in another towel and rubbed it vigorously to dry it a bit and then twisted it up into a turban-like style. She let the towel around her body come loose and she dried herself as best she could before slipping on the kimono and tying it loosely. When she was done, she slipped out of the bathhouse quietly, seeing that the rest of the castle was already asleep and she didn't want to disturb anyone. She went to her room and sat down at a small table near her bedside, a match to the one where she kept her paperwork for the household, but this one held a large mirror and different ribbons and things for her to tie up her hair with. She had some makeup, but didn't wear it because, as a miko, she had to promote modesty and virtue.

_It would be nice to put it on, just once when no one can see me._ She reached out and gently picked up a wooden box that sat at the far edge of the table. It was lacquered in a rich black and decorated ornately with gold and silver paint in designs of tiny leaves and floral patterns. She opened it, and carefully removed the contents, setting them in a row in front of her. Then, picking up a small dish, she filled it with water from a pitcher and reached to pick up a fine tipped brush, which she delicately dipped into the dish. She opened a small jar, the lid tinkling quietly as it brushed against the lip, and swirled the brush lightly inside of it. When she brought the brush back out, it was tinted a pinkish-red and she gently brushed it against her lips making them colored a sheer pale red. From there she went to the next item, blush, and swept the large brush light across the apples of her cheeks. Finally, eye shadow, which was a near perfect match to the color that adorned her lords eyes. After that she took a plain purple ribbon and tied her hair back loosely so it was out of her face as it dried.

She sat and stared into the mirror, her face barely lit up by the scarce lamplight. Still, she felt beautiful and she smiled warmly at her reflection, but it did little to appease her hurting heart. _Why did they have to show up around here? What will Lord Sesshoumaru do if he finds them lurking around in the woods? Surely there will only be death that follows. I have to chase them away before he returns again. _ She looked down and turned her head away, gazing towards the shoji door that was partly open to let the summer breeze in. She stood, and walked over to it, sliding it open the rest of the way so she could see her little garden she had planted. It was her on respite nowadays. She had all sorts of flowers and at the very front was a beautiful patch of lotus flowers. She smiled sadly and picked one of the blossoms that had just begun to bloom and pinned it delicately up in her hair. As she sat watching her garden, seeing a few of Rin's wistful firefly friends twinkling in the night, she began to think about her life now and how it had come to be that way in the first place.

------------------------------_Almost A Year Ago_------------------------------

Kagome stared up at the sky, the stars twinkling brightly against the dark canvas and the moon curved in a waning crescent that reminded her of the mark on her companion's forehead. She bunched her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, laying her head onto her knees and tilting it to look in his direction. "How…how much time is left?"

Sesshoumaru stood beside her, still and foreboding like the tall trees around them. He glanced down at her with glassy golden eyes that were a perfect match to his brothers, except for the warmth of emotions, which Sesshoumaru certainly lacked. His response to her question was brief. "Soon."

She sat up straight again and turned away from him, staring down the small hill towards the hut where she knew that her beloved InuYasha was dying. _And his death draws nearer and nearer. Oh, I hope I am doing the right thing._

Truly, earlier that night she never would have thought it would come to this. She'd run off, completely distraught by the gravity of InuYasha's injuries and the feeling that she had been responsible for it. She just had to find a way, but her thoughts were so jumbled that she couldn't come to any conclusion. So she hid from her friends when they had gone searching for her, wanting to console her, but she knew she was inconsolable. And, it would kill her if she had to bear witness to his untimely death. So she sat there, in the dark dirty woods for hours, until finally her prayers were answered and she was given a miracle. Sesshoumaru had shown up.

She watched him slipping in and out of the trees like a majestic apparition. She shirked back, wondering if she would dare to run, but by then the wind had changed and he caught her scent in the air. He was on her in seconds, looming over her pitiful form much like he was doing presently. "Girl, you reek of the blood of my brother and the stench of Naraku. If you value your life, you'll tell me which way the villain and his minions went."

"I…I don't remember." she rasped out, her voice trapped in her throat. He reached down and picked her up by her shirt and pinned her to the tree by her shoulders, bringing his face perilously close to hers.

"I know you have the ability to sense the jewel. Where is it?" His eyes narrowed and his grip on her shoulders tightened, and his claws dug into them.

"P…p…please. Just let me mourn." she had hoped that Sesshoumaru had some sense of decency or would at least grow tired of her lack of answers and leave her be.

"So, then my brother is dead." Sesshoumaru's voice seemed to hold a bit of contentment saying those words.

"No!" she screamed and struggled to loosen herself from his grasp.

"But he is still dying, isn't he you pathetic human. You're covered in his blood and even a hanyou like him couldn't survive wounds that would have caused that much." New tears streamed down her face and she kicked her legs wildly. And then she saw Sesshoumaru smirk, but it quickly faded back to a dispassionate expression. Then he simply loosened his grip and dropped her back where she was and walked away.

"He let me go?" Kagome whispered to herself as she curled up into herself and rocked lightly. A few minutes later, she heard the rustling of leaves and looked up to see Sesshoumaru's toady vassal leading his two-headed beast, and asleep on it's back was that sweet little girl that had somehow found her place in the taiyoukai's entourage. _That's right. I remember now, Sesshoumaru used his Tenseiga...to bring her back to life!_

With that simple thought in her mind, she jumped to her feet, and blindly began running in the direction where the dog daemon had gone, startling the toad as she burst past him and off into the distance after his lord and master. His young charge was woken by his loud yelp and sat up rubbing her eyes. "What's wrong Master Jaken?"

"A…a human girl is chasing after Lord Sesshoumaru!" And all Jaken could do was stare after.

Kagome caught up with him though and he turned to face her with that stoic glare, his eyes narrowing slightly, as if questioning her presence there. "Have you changed your mind?"

"No." Kagome clenched her fists and stood her ground, trying to copy his cold demeanor. "However I have a proposition for you."

"And what could a weak mortal like you do for me?" Sesshoumaru was intrigued by this, for only moments before this same girl was nearly voiceless and quivering with fear at his might.

"I want you to use your Tenseiga to revive InuYasha after he dies." The daemon lord's eyes widened a bit, and then settled.

"And why would I do such a thing. I want that worthless hanyou dead so I can claim the Tetsusaiga, which is mine by **right**." He watched her as she stood unmoving from the place where she had planted herself.

"If you do that, I will help you find Naraku. I will do anything you ask of me. Save him, and I'll help you be the one to have the glory of knowing that such a foul creature died by the hands of…of the great Lord Sesshoumaru of the Western Lands." She held her breath a moment, and let it out as he came to answer.

"Anything? I suppose that your 'endearing love' for my pathetic brother has driven you to this. Well then girl, are you willing to give up anything and everything you hold dear and serve me without question? Even if it means never seeing your family or your companions for the entirety of your life?" He saw her lip quiver and her eyes glance slightly to the side in thought.

"Yes. Save him. Please." her voice was pleading and her legs were beginning to feel so heavy.

"Hmm. But how will I know that you will not just run off after this? Humans are such deceitful creatures after all." His eyes narrowed again, watching her viciously.

"I…I don't know." She looked away and turned back slightly startled as Jaken, the beast, and Rin emerged behind her.

"Jaken." At his master's voice, the toad daemon toddled over and bowed at his feet.

"Yes, my lord?" The toad looked up at him.

"Is there not a way to mask one's scent and appearance?" Jaken put a hand to his mouth and thought for a few moments.

"For this girl? Hm?" He paused between his questions and thought deeper for a few moments more." There may be a…a potion that can do so, and I've also heard of such a technique performed by priests…and the like, but it takes _much_ practice to master."

"Make this potion at once and bring it to me when you've finished. I've things that need attending to." Jaken bowed again and scurried off, taking the others with him.

"So, you'll bring him back?" Kagome stepped closer to the daemon lord, her eyes watering slightly as she looked at him expectantly.

"Yes. But you must agree to certain terms." He answered.

"Name them." She said, lacking any hesitation.

"First, you must drink the potion and become a part of my entourage. You will obey any orders you are given, even if they are something you may find objectionable. Secondly, you will not stray from my sight unless ordered to do so and if you decide to run, I _will_ kill you. Lastly, to ensure your obedience, to keep track of you, and to let other daemons know you are untouchable, I will mark you." She heart jumped at his words, unsure of the intent behind them.

"Mark me?" her voice had grown quiet again.

"Yes. Mark you. I will leave two scar marks along the back of your neck that will emanate my scent to other daemons, as well as show proof to human scourge that you are more or less the property of a daemon. Do you understand girl?" She nodded and he stepped forward, cracking his claws as he approached her.

"But, not until you resurrect him." she backed away again and he looked at her, but nodded slightly.

"Then we've reached an agreement. Come, we have to wait for his death to befall him, only then can I slay the servants of hell and bring the life back to him." He turned and walked away, and she followed. _And that is how we find ourselves now._ She sighed and was startled when Sesshoumaru growled lightly to get her attention.

"It is done. InuYasha's life has ceased to be." He spoke as if it were nothing important at all, which to him, it wasn't, but to her it was the hardest thing to have to hear.

"So, go, save him now." she said, motioning her head towards the village.

"Not until Jaken returns with the potion." he chided. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out, and they waited a while more into early hours of the next morning just hours before daybreak, discussing how to go about this. Sesshoumaru was adamant that no one knew he had saved his brother's life, most likely for reasons of pride and to keep them from pursuing him when Kagome disappeared and it was up to Kagome to shoo them away from the hut in order to do so. After that, he would sneak in and resurrect the hanyou and then both would leave. So, when Jaken had come with the potion in hand and gave it to his master. From there, their plan fell into order and Kagome watched as her friends grew frightened and excited at the discovery that their companion had come back from the afterlife.

And she shed silent tears as she was led away by her new lord and master, who left his mark on the nape of her neck and then made her down the foul tasting potion that had changed her from Kagome, to who she was now, Kiga-san, Lady Miko, a servant to her beloved's enemy.

In the following months she learned the technique Jaken had mentioned and mastered it, and also found herself to be the new keeper of her lord's human follower, which came as welcome relief to Jaken. And whenever she sensed the shikon no tama that Naraku held, she would point the way and he and his vassal would disappear for a time, only to return unsuccessfully and continue their journey. During that time she bonded with the sweet child and both adopted nicknames for one another, mostly due to Rin's constant mispronouncing of her name. She, of course, was Kiga-san, and the girl had become Rii-chan. If not for her current circumstances, she might have thought of Rin as the sister she never had.

And when the finally had come to the castle, the loyal daemon and human vassals had at first been disturbed by her "changing face" as they called it, but they all had come to recognize both as the face of the Lord Sesshoumaru's personal miko and most only knew her as Lady Miko. Her true name, now, was only ever used at her lord's leisure and that of Rin and her lord's toady vassal, Jaken.

------------------------------_Present Day_------------------------------

Kagome sighed and tucked a fallen wisp of hair behind her ear. She knew that it was probably best that she get to bed and rest before setting out after her troublesome former companions, but she didn't feel the least bit tired. She closed her eyes, and smiled as InuYasha's face came to mind. _I miss him so terribly. I miss them all, but he, I miss the most. I just wish that things hadn't had to be this way. But InuYasha is alive, and for that I am eternally grateful._ She got up from where she sat and went over to the large thick futon that had been specially made for her to mimic the mattresses she used to have at home and it was covered with fine silk sheets, beautifully embroidered thicker blankets for the winter months and plus pillows that were incredibly soft. Still, as inviting as the bed was, her thoughts were still too fumbled for her to be able to rest. However, she lay down and snuggled gently with one of the larger pillows, shutting her eyes briefly.

She hadn't been lying down long when she heard the shuffling of feet outside her door and Shika's voice quietly broke the silence. "Lady Miko. Our lord and master has returned earlier than planned and is rather unsettled by something of which he refuses to speak of, except to you. I told him you had already gone to bed for the night, but he demanded your presence in his chambers immediately. He said my life was forfeit if I didn't summon you. Please forgive me."

The woman sounded so scared, something that was typical when a servant had received an order from Lord Sesshoumaru. Kagome rose from bed and went over to the door and opened it to see the woman kneeling and shaking fearfully. She knelt down beside the doe youkai and smiled softly, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Shika, it's all right. I would not let our lord harm you. Please, go ahead and return to bed. I can see to our lord by myself."

The woman nodded and wiped a tear away from her eyes and scurried off back to the servant's quarters. _This can't bode well. Lord Sesshoumaru never returns early from anything. He's either upset about his recent trip…or for what he may have found lurking in the woods on his way home._ She closed her eyes and stood again, closing the shoji door behind her and made her way through the winding corridors of the castle until she came to the great doors that led into the Lord's Suite, as she had dubbed it. Not far away from there was another set of great doors that had probably been meant for the lady of the castle. That entire section of the castle was empty and had been entered last when they had cleared the bodies out. But everything else that was salvageable remained. Ornate furniture, fine vases, a few baubles that had been deemed unworthy by marauders, and the former lady of the castle's expansive collection of kimonos. Kagome had decided to keep them, at first because of their beauty and later because they could be sold for a good amount of coin should they fall on hard times. Of course, she had longed to try one or two on, but it was something not easily done alone.

She turned away again and reached out to knock gently on the door before it slid open and she was less than enthusiastically greeted by a servant who rushed out behind her, mumbling a greeting to her as he left. Kagome watched him go and closed the door, and turned back when she felt the scars at the back of her neck grow warm and was meet by Sesshoumaru's golden eyed glare.

"I've been waiting. We have _very_ important matters to discuss." He said, extending a clawed hand and motioning her foreword. _This can not be good.  
_

* * *

**AUTHORS NOTE: **Some little things I want to point out to you that I thought you readers might enjoy and probably wouldn't have caught without my mentioning it. The flowers or scents that have been mentioned each have their own meaning and hint towards the personality or to certain plots in this chapter. Here's all the one's included if you'd like to know:

1. Kagome's Bath Oil: The smell of the bath oil is primarily of Jasmine. In Japan, in the meaning of the flowers, the Jasmine flower is perfect for someone who is graceful or friendly. I thought it suited Kagome well.

2. The Lotus Flower: Lotus flowers mean "far from a loved one." In ancient times women used to cultivate them in their yards while their lover was away to let potential suitors know that they were unavailable. Kagome obviously misses her friends and family, and InuYasha especially.


	4. Her Place

Kagome took a step forward and paused a moment, taking in the sight of her lord and master, who was at the far end of the room. He stood tall and intimidating there, his eyes locked onto her as though he might charge her at any minute and rip her throat out. She avoided his gaze, but still had to look him over. He was much different that she'd seen him before. He had his armor removed and was wearing an entirely different outfit than she was used to. His current appearance made him seem more like a human lord of the manor rather than the fearsome demon lord that he was. He wore a plain blue kimono that would normally be worn under a haori which was tucked into a pair simple black hakama. If she hadn't of known better, she might have thought he was docile.

_Ha! Docile? He's more likely to rip someone in half with his claws for no more reason than that he just could before he could be considered docile._ She mentally chided herself and blinked hard as she tried to regain her composure.

Sesshoumaru cleared his throat and she hurried over to him, having to dodge his illustriously laid out bed to do so. Certainly, she had been in this room before to discuss things such as Rin's well being and, as always, Naraku. But this was the first time she'd been in his room when it wasn't set formally with the bed put away and a table, much like her own, pulled out, but piled with papers of great importance. Now, that table had been pushed just to the side of the bed near a table with a large bouquet of fresh flowers in a painted vase that had probably been frantically put together with his early arrival. In it were several flowers she had come to recognize, as many grew in her private garden. Red tulips, edelweiss, a few daffodils, and some sparse red poppies and lavender for a pleasant smell were all bunched in together to make an awkward combination. _I suppose all these differences are because he has returned home at such an unusual time._

"My lord." Kagome bowed deeply to him and tucked her hands into her sleeves after the greeting. Sesshoumaru replied with a nod of the head and swept his hand with a quick flourish towards the table. She nodded to his silent command and sat down at the table across from him.

He picked up a few papers and shuffled them to the side so they were not in the way and looked up to address her. "As I said, we have important matters to discuss."

"Is that the cause for your early return milord?" She made sure not to meet his gaze. It was far too brazen, as he would say, for her to do so. Sesshoumaru commanded total obedience from his followers.

"Hai." he replied briefly, looking up at her and paused a moment before speaking. "As you well know, I was in the east and close on the trail of that half-demon scum, Naraku. It just so happened that the trail suddenly went cold on me. And what I found at the end of that trail was_bothersome_. Do you know what I found?"

"Iie, no, milord, but one can assume it would follow his nefarious pattern of terrible death and destruction." She replied curtly, glancing up his way for only a moment before looking away again.

"Normally, you would be correct. But what I found was not the gore of his caliber, but rather something that will present itself to be quite troublesome in my quest to destroy him." She watched as Sesshoumaru tightened the grip on his right hand and then loosened it again while his expression remained unchanged. "I found the leftover ingredients for and a few remaining puddles of the masking potion that you had once used to hide your true self. With that in the hands of such a cur, I am unable to use my talents to seek him out. The only person who is capable of such a thing is you."

"What are your plans then, Lord Sesshoumaru?" She asked.

"I need time to strategize, perhaps a week, two at most. After that you, Jaken, and I will return to the abandoned castle where I made my discovery." He then turned his head slightly and stared at the vase of flowers for a moment before he stood. Kagome watched as he made his way to the table and looked over the flowers in the vase. "I will also use that time to take care of another problem, once that has recently developed. And _tha_t is the problem of my meddling brother and his impudent band of friends who've recently taken up camp far to close to the castle grounds for my liking."

"They didn't leave?" Kagome blurted out before she could catch herself.

"You knew they were here?" His voice held an unnerving twinge of anger in it and he turned to face her, his face still as calm as ever despite the sound in his voice. And it sent a chill down her spine so deep that she couldn't help but shiver from it.

"H…hai, my lord. Rin, Rin got lost this morning after leaving the grounds without permission…wanted to pick flowers…for…you." Her voice escaped her for a moment, blocked by the tightening in her throat, and she had to cough to continue. "They found her only moments before I had. They didn't recognize me, but they recognized Rin and Ah-Un. I sent them away, demanded it, but they are far too curious for they're own good."

"I see." He said, walking over to her and grabbing her abruptly by the chin and held tight, jerking her head up to look straight at him. And his golden eyes were like fire burning through her as he examined her face, most likely looking for even the single hint of a lie. "However, this Sesshoumaru is wary of their intentions and of _yours_. But you have thus far been unwaveringly loyal to me despite the circumstances, so I chose to believe what you say…this time. But don't think that means I trust you not to run off to your _beloved_. I will be watching. Now leave."

He let go, swinging her head away and she could feel her teeth gritting. There were always the good meetings and the bad meetings between them, but they had always been in far more formal settings and not so late in the evening. Still, he had never so roughly laid his hands on her before. And she didn't appreciate that he had. _He should at least respect me, if only for the fact that I am a miko._ She felt her heart beating wildly in her chest as she stood and bowed to him, mostly mumbling her goodbye before going to the door.

But as she reached it and had just begun to open it, he spoke to her again, the hotness gone from his tone. "Miko."

She paused and turned back, gently watching him. He had gone back the vase of flowers and had pulled the poppies and the lavender out of the group. She spoke gently to him. "Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

He turned his head back slightly to look at her. "You should clean your face. Such indulgences like make-up are unappealing of a miko."

She furrowed her brows a bit before she realized he was talking about the makeup she had put on earlier that night as a personal pleasure and a reminder of a now seemingly distant past. She blinked a few times, her eyes watering slightly as she turned away and looked back again in time to see him crush the flowers he had pulled out before dropping them to the floor like garbage and stepping on them.

Kagome snuck out the door as quiet and as quickly as she could, for fear of another reprimand from him. She slid the door shut with a quiet rap of the frame and fell to her knees, letting out a hurt gasp that she had been holding in. For that moment in which Sesshoumaru had grabbed her face, she had been so sure that she would have been dead as soon as he let her go. Now, it took all her strength not to break into tears. She put a hand to her heart and could feel it fluttering wildly in her chest. With her other hand she wiped away the tears that had welled up at the edge of her eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out loudly before she got to her feet, trembling a bit.

She had always been strong and faced everything head-on, but he instilled a fear in her so deep that it sometimes gave her nightmares. She hadn't been afraid of him before, but then, she hadn't really known all that he was capable of. The world around her felt distorted as she made her way back along the corridors to her bedroom, the only sound she heard clearly being the pattering of her own feet against the wooden floorboards. She returned to her room feeling drained and flopped onto her bed, staring blankly at the ceiling as her lord's last remark bounced through her mind.

"_You should clean your face. Such indulgences like make-up are unappealing of a miko."_

She furrowed her brows and scowled to herself as she muttered. "He should listen to his own advice."

_He's the GUY wearing make-up._ She harrumphed and blew at the loose wisps of hair that had fallen over her face before she rolled off the bed and onto her feet. She sat at her little table with the mirror and looked at herself. She looked so tired, and couldn't even bear to smile at herself like she normally would. Silently, she took a cloth and wetted it down before wiping away the make-up from her face. _Better not to incite his anger._ She sighed, as she wiped away the last traces of the make-up and realized that she finally sympathized with Kikyo.

Kagome laughed quietly at that thought. She had never felt any sympathy for that woman before, and now, trapped in nearly the same conditions, she could see all the things that were similar. She got up and lay down onto the bed, closing her eyes and breathing in the feathery scent of her pillow, letting InuYasha's face fill her mind as she lay there, trying to sleep. It made her smile to think of him. I wasn't often that she did because it usually made her so sad, but seeing him that day brought her the tiniest glimpse of hope that she might be able to find a way to free herself from her servitude to Sesshoumaru.

"K…Kiga-san?" A small voice called out from beyond the door. Kagome opened her eyes and saw the silhouette of a little girl flickering against the shoji from the pale lamplight on the other side. Kagome got up and went to the door, sliding it open quietly and smiling down at Rin's tear-streaked face.

"Rii-chan." Kagome spoke softly to the girl as her arms encircled her small body, picking her up and cradling her on her shoulder as she closed the door again. She ran her fingers through the girl's hair and kissed her head to soothe her before gently setting her down on the bed. Kagome caressed her cheek and wiped away the tears from them. "Did you have another bad dream?"

"Ah huh." Rin replied, sitting up and hugging Kagome close as she buried her head into her side and whimpered. "I had a dream that the bad man sent wolves after me. Only they weren't normal wolves. These ones had wings and they chased after me even after I flew away on Ah-Un. They knocked me off and I was _falling_, but I woke up before I hit the ground. I was so scared Kiga-san!"

"I'm sure you were." Kagome kissed the girls forehead and smiled at her. "But the wolves can never get you because our Lord wouldn't let them."

"But Lord Sesshoumaru isn't always here anymore!" Rin cried out, clutching onto the sleeve of Kagome's kimono.

"I'm here though, aren't I? You know I would never, ever let anyone even try to hurt you." Kagome hugged her and laid her down on the bed, covering her with the blankets. She heard Rin sigh softly as she got up and went to the other side of the bed, climbing in with the girl. "I'll let you sleep in my bed tonight, but next time I want you to be a big girl and stay in your own room, okay?"

"Okay. I'm so glad you're here Kiga-san." Rin said with a yawn, curling into Kagome as the older girl held her gently and stroked her hair. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Rin." Kagome told the girl as she fell asleep. Rin smiled and snuggled closer, soon fast asleep.

Kagome sighed and closed her eyes, finding that she had to wipe away a tear that fell down her cheek. _Sometimes it feels as if Rin is my daughter. I love her as though she were, but, she'll never _truly_ be my child. I can never have a child of my own, not as long as I'm a servant of Sesshoumaru's. I won't even be able to ever get married either._ Thoughts like this reminded Kagome of the weddings and births that had taken place in the castle while she was there.

------------------------------_Some Months Ago_------------------------------

"Oh, that's a lovely kimono Asako!" said a young girl who sat among a group of three or four others who surrounded an older girl. Kagome saw them from a distance, and was curious as to what they were up to. So, while pretending to be inspecting the castle grounds she walked close by the group and eavesdropped into their conversation. Those girls, after all, reminded her of the way she and her friends: Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi, once were.

"Yes, it will be perfect for your wedding to Hiroshi." Another girl chattered, smiling wide to Asako, who covered her mouth as she laughed and blushed at the thought of her wedding. Kagome glanced their way as she walked by, accidentally catching their attention with her stare.

"Oh, Lady Miko!" Asako said to Kagome first, bowing to her along with the others, before addressing the others in a hushed voice. "We should be working! Come on girls, let take care of our chores."

In a rush they disappeared, before Kagome even had time to tell them it was okay. Thus was how fearful the servants were of Sesshoumaru's wrath. Kagome could something pull painfully at her heart that made her cry out quietly.

------------------------------_Present_------------------------------

That was the first time Kagome realized her new place in the world. She couldn't even share in the joyous event of a wedding, and could never have one of her own. After that, she heard that the girl, Asako and her new husband, Hiroshi, another of the servants, had left the castle to start their life elsewhere. _Maybe, if I am able to help Sesshoumaru destroy Naraku, I'll be free of our agreement and then I can be with InuYasha again. Maybe._ With that though, she could feel sleep slowly drawing her up and she let it take her away into a deep sleep.

* * *

_Some more little things about the flowers that I want to point out to you that I thought you readers might enjoy and probably wouldn't have caught without my mentioning it._

_1. Sesshoumaru's Bouquet: Red tulips stand for pride and the orange poppies mean 'success.' In Japan the edelweiss means both 'courage' and 'power' but it is also known as the flower of eternity because even when dried it looks about the same as it does alive.__The daffodil is the perfect flower to give to bosses, teachers, older relatives, and public figures because it means 'respect' in Japan.__Red poppies are seen as 'fun-loving' flowers in Japan and_ _lavender means 'you are always in my heart.' Which of these flowers did Sesshoumaru pick out of the bouquet and crush?_


End file.
